The winner of the 2000 and 2004 Presidential elections, the man who had so much political capital that he strutted like a rooster, let us see his real chicken side as he finished his G-8 cameo appearance. George the chicken hero Bush rushed away from the G-8 meeting where he had been outshined by everyone attending and headed to Rome to see the Pope. The Pope certainly has enough problems to deal with, like priest abusing children, too few men (all men except practicing homosexuals) signing up for the seminary, dwindling money giving parishioners, and great worries about darwinism, but never the less he had time to see George. (My guess is that the Pope figured he was someone with more problems than he had).
George rushed to the Popes side and with his head bowed was heard to say, “Man oh man, have I ever screwed things up in Iraq. Your Holiness, do you have any ideas or miracles you can work?”
The Pope was heard to reply, “Yes George, you were a dumb excuse for a human being for letting let all those radicals and fundamentalists run unbounded. You should have known that Cheney, Rumsfeld, Pearl, Wolfowitz, and Feith could not be trusted. Didn’t Pastor Falwell tell you anything?” The Pope continued, “the only miracle I have for you is that just maybe you can get through this term without getting impeached”.
For these words of advice, George told reporters he was awed by the Pope.
But the “chicken hero” award (first place) goes to George’s display on Sunday walking triumphantly through the crowds in Albania to the cheers of thousands. It probably did not occur to the Albanians that George was thinking they really liked him when in fact the Albanians hold positive memories of the US for principly the work of Woodrow Wilson and Bill Clinton. But for our chicken hero, the cheers were for him.
The G-8 summit turned out much better than I had expected and George did little to add to the US embarassment. In a perverse way, it was wonderful to see someone who is so full of himself playing second or third fiddle to other heads of state. You can fool heads of state once or twice (as George and company have done) but on this meeting, they knew they were dealing with a poker player who held no cards.
The chicken hero is now home and will turn his attention to the immigration debate. While his work on this issue can not over come the damage done by his Iraq policy in terms of his legacy, he will try mightily. Watch and see the chicken hero show his colors when he caves on the humane and sensible aspects of the legilation in order to get enough votes to pass something. The chicken hero is done.